Thousands of Idiots Fell For This

Old Pickup Truck

He wears his jacket at the doorsteps with a sigh

as his wife Jade comes running to say goodbye

he gives her a hug

takes his mug

and he drives his old pickup truck

[Chorus]
He sings his mother’s soothing serenade

as he sees his life all behind him fade

he prayed for Jade

and his antiques trade

it’s been a decade

since he got paid

But he’s happy in his old pickup truck

He sees a gas station on the highway

he pulls over to fill up at the pump

he hears a chug

in the engine’s plug

so he gets out of his old pickup truck

He kicks the car then opens the front hood

he swears at the day he saw this neighborhood

the truck is stuck

now, that’s bad luck

he decides to sleep in the damn pickup truck

The next day, he wakes up feeling dizzy

it’s a new day and he wants to get busy

there was a rotten duck

that the engine sucked

and it made the whole car smell pretty yuck

A homeless fart asks him for some change

so he tells him to smile once for a change

he pays a buck

to the geezer schmuck

then he rides his old pickup truck

He goes to work and finishes all alone
Feeling dead tired and sore to the bone
He’s finally home
To Jade he says shalom
He sleeps and dreams of the old pickup truck

ياللي حابس نفسك في الصفيحه

This is a poem that I wrote today. It has some hidden meanings and subliminal messages.

ياللي حابس نفسك في الصفيحه
خدها يا ابني مني نصيحه

سيبك من الفقري واللي تلاقيه إيحه

اتجوز الصريحه و إبعد عن القبيحه

فهمت ولا لسه ميحه؟

لو مافهمتش ركز معايا يا إبن المليحه

هكلملك الدنيا اللي فاكرانا دبيحه

الكلام ليكي دلوقتي يا ست دنيا
يا قاسيه و عامله نفسك كولونيا

ليه عماله تلطشي في؟

ده أنا ماليش في الشر وباكره الأذية

إتفائلت وقلت وشك حلو علي

كده برضه تغدري بي؟

ولاد الحلال يتعدوا عالصوابع

هم اتنين تلاتة صعب تلاقيلهم رابع

أما ولاد الحرام حتى على بيوتنا فاتوا

صدقت ستي لما قالت: اللي اختشوا ماتوا

على قد ما فيكي خير.. الشر برضه أكتر

الحقد موجود والبغض مولود

والظلم بقى إيه؟ الله أكبر

وانتي قاعده في منتهى البرود

شايفه غابه مليانه قرود بتهاجم أسود

القسوه بتسود والطريق شكله مسدود

بس القلب يعود يعزف نغمه عالعود

تشيل الجمود و تسبح رب الجنود

اللي بيفك قيود واللي هيشيل منك الدود

ده هييجي بالموعود ويبارك الوجود

ياللي حابس نفسك في الصفيحه

اطلع من الصفيحه دي ريحتها كريهه

اديني هزقتلك الدنيا وما فيها

اقف وقول بأعلى صوت ليها

لأ يا نبيهه

لا الصفيحة لي ولا أنا ليها

دي الحكاية مش عايزة بديهه

بس انتي مالكيش فيها

يا أنا يا انتي يا دنيا

و فيها لاخفيها

And Before You Know It...

Copyright means Copy is not Right

Did you know? The song Happy Birthday was written by two sisters from Kentucky named Mildred and Patricia Hill. The original song was called 'Good Morning to All', it was used to greet the children of the school where Mildred and Patty teached. The song appeared for the first time in a book in 1924.

Anyway, my point is that the song we all know is copyrighted. If you use the song in public in the United States, you're meant to pay Time-warner/AOL for each performance. I'm serious. They make $2 million a year from it. The two women have passed away a long time ago but I don't think they ever made a nickel from it.

Copyrights are a serious issue. Google is filled with copyvios and I know one day I'll see my posts on one of them. so I decided to write my Terms of Use of this blog. You'll find it at the very bottom of each page on this website. Please spend a minute or two to familiarize yourself with it.

I Have Learned

I've been working all day and was bored out of my mind. I was waiting for something interesting to happen until my cell phone started ringing...

(ME for MaximEyes, WC for Woman Caller)

ME: Hello!

WC: Hi, the cell phone you gave me is not working.

ME: I think you got the wrong number, ma'am.

WC: What do you mean I got the wrong number?

ME: Ummm, I mean this is not who you're trying to reach.

WC: I'm calling Rogers. You are Rogers.

ME: No, I'm not Rogers. I told you this is the wrong number.

WC: Hey listen. You have to fix my phone because...

I hung up on her, went back to work, and learned that there are people who are more stupid than my boss.

YA7YA AL 3ADL!!11one

A Saudi woman who was gang-raped by 14 men has been sentenced to 200 lashes and 6 months in prison, the BBC reports. Her original crime was being in the car with a man unrelated to her, but her punishment was doubled and prison time added when she appealed the original sentence. Judges said she tried to use the media to influence them; her lawyer says the sentence violates both Sharia law and international conventions.

Seven of the woman's rapists were sentenced to prison time; the judges also doubled their sentences. The woman's attorney has been suspended from the case and had his license revoked. He says the court let personal views influence it and vowed to file another appeal.

Source: BBC
My Comment: Not Available

YMCA's ON and OFF

Quiz

If you are in a hotel room, the bedside lamp is ON and you want to sleep. Which of the following actions would you take? (Choose all that apply)

a. Turn off the lamp. If you can't turn it off, unplug it.
b. Cover the lamp with a blanket.

A blanket caught fire in one of the rooms last weekend because some family at the YMCA found this question a little challenging.

Letter

Dear mosquitoes, gnats, ticks, biting flies, chiggers and fleas,

I used the OFF spray at the conference this long weekend and you weren't able to suck on my blood. Only one of you guys was able to make it to my right leg. But I executed him soon after he had his last meal.

So long, We shall meet again sometime this summer in Egypt. You've been repelled, you little SUCKERS!

Re-guards,
MaximEyes

Shake Your Booty

Do you remember This Post when I talked about technology and smart inventions? I'm going to introduce to you today an invention that combines between two important things in our life. The first thing is the elimination of fecal waste and the second is music. Is it more fun to do both at the same time? The intellect inventor of the Atech iCarta Stereo Dock thinks so.

It's a toilet paper holder that has a dock for the iPod so you can listen to your favorite songs while you take a dump. This "device" is being sold at one of the local computer stores in Toronto. I found the description to be a little funny.

You might run out of toilet paper, but you'll never run out of
tunes with the Atech iCarta Stereo Dock for your iPod.

How lame is that! I'm never gonna purchase this item because I read in the description that Toilet paper is not included. I mean, if I'm gonna pay $67.99 (plus tax and shipping) for the Atech iCarta Stereo Dock, I'd expect them to throw in a toilet paper roll so I can start using my new item right away. Now I think it's a rip off.

White Lies

Do you believe in white lies? Some people believe that white lies cause no discord because this type of lies doesn’t have any intention to harm anyone.

An example of white lies would be when John tells Peter that he bought a new Corvette, when he actually didn’t. If you come to think of it, this lie doesn’t cause any harm to Peter. But what John didn’t expect is that Peter, who cannot afford the price of the Corvette’s tires, might suffer from a blow to his self esteem as a result of this lie. So, he’s now harmed. And therefore, this lie is no longer considered a white lie. That’s what I think.

But what if our lies won’t harm anyone? Why don’t we all white lie? It could be because our mothers always taught us that lying is wrong. And we learned from the bible that lying is a sin in God’s eyes. Yes, it’s a sin that is as wicked as murder and adultery. The ninth of the Ten Commandments in Exodus 20 reads “Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor”. Bearing witness is lying, and all people are “our neighbor”. So if we deceit people, then we’re sinning. That’s how bad it is. The New Testament also tells us "Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices" in Colossians 3:9. However, I’m still confused about the rightness of white lies. If you lie to make someone feel better, is it really wrong? If a guy lies to a girl (who he thinks is far from good looking) and tells her she’s good looking, I don’t think he’s made a mistake. As a matter of fact, he made her feel better about herself, which is a good deed. Though, it won’t be considered a white lie anymore if things got more complicated than anticipated when the girl starts thinking that he likes her. Uh-oh! Faux pas, Monsieur. Leading a girl on is a bad thing to do.
OK let's fix the scenario! Say you're complimenting an ugly straight friend of yours of the same sex on their looks. Is it right or wrong?

I don’t know. In my humble opinion, white lying that offers benefit to the liar or the hearer (or both) is definitely better than other forms of deceptions. But my argument on whether it is bad or not is still debatable.

I Like April 1st

The Sun Rose and The Son Rose

Today we celebrate the power and glory of the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead. His resurrection changes the past, the present, and the future. Easter helps us understand the story of salvation that God has put in the past, gives personal experience with the grace and love of God in the present, and gives confident hope for the future.
Happy Easter, everyone!